Why do things go wrong?
Was it some thing Lisa done was it her egg was it my sperm? Sorry of this sound crude but this is some questions that went through my mind.
Lisa did not drink of smoke through her pregnancy and she did not overdo things either.
Personally I do not think things would have changed even if she had been cutting the grass of lifting heavy objects.
Pre-eclampsia is still a subject that most Doctors do not have an explanation for as to why it happens.
Information I looked at in the States suggests that the mother lacks protein in the diet. Whilst there is no firm evidence of this Lisa did go off of protein type foods to the extent of being physically sick.
Of course there are many different reasons why babies are born prematurely. It could be even a car crash, an infection there seem to be so many reasons why things do go wrong.
And of course we were told all the worse case scenarios of what could go wrong. Not very nice, but could you really expect to be told that "your baby will do well?"
At the end of the day no one can predict the future and my way of coping with the worry was simple and logical.
"Why worry about what might happen when you could get run over by a bus?"
Simple but effective. It did help me a bit but different people use different ways to cope.
Don't blame yourself and don't blame your wife.
The other thing to remember as well is that that little baby is missing out as well. Growing in a secure place, and being born and then bonding. So there are three of you missing out.
The weeks are long and our premi baby being home seems long as well but the weeks seem as well to fly by it is like you are moving forward but standing still.
"Good things come in little packages"